Torn

Have you ever found yourself wishing and hoping that something that had the potential to be extremely positive wouldn't work out? I'm sure some of you have. For me it's job related this time out. I have scheduled an interview for a position I didn't apply for with an organization that had my resume on file from a previous submittal. They wanted to do an interview with me a.s.a.p. for a position they need to fill. When I read the position description I was surprised they would deem me qualified to interview for this one since I felt I was more qualified for the previous one and I didn't score an interview that time. I'm not sure how many folks they are interviewing, and I really think someone else will end up fitting the bill moreso than I, but I'm still nervous that they might want me. This is an organization that would, undoubtedly, be really rewarding to work for, which is what I want in a work situation. They have a very positive purpose and if I didn't have something else on my plate of possibilities I would be begging for this job. But isn't that always the way it works? Of course this is all extremely hypothetical at this stage, but it's one of those situations where you have been waiting for or wanting something for ages, and then when the time finally comes you have (possibly) two paths you have to choose from. And, as Murphy would have it, you never have a clean and simple (or in this case timely) choice...it always has to be complicated.
The other possibility on my plate is exactly what I have wanted to do (or I have convinced myself it is at least) for a very long time. And it would also involve a relocation that I would like to make. That organization is hiring for several positions, so my chances are greatly boosted, and I have a couple of other things that have the potential to boost my chances further. The problem? The deadline just passed for that one so it will still be 2-4 weeks before I learn if I even get an interview =-(. Before I thought my chances were extremely good at landing an interview until I realized I submitted my application with a cursed, overlooked typo =-(. AAAAAHHHHHH damn typo!!!!! However, even w/that stupid, stupid error, I still think I have a good shot at an interview.

So I find I am horribly torn. In all likelihood, if the job gods are to continue along the Shababbler job-path selected thus far, neither one will wind up happening, but what if, in some twist of luck(?), both are offered....only, by the time I knew the one I really wanted was or wasn't offered, it would be long past the time I would have had to make a decision about the first one. Timing. It's such a significant factor in so many areas of our lives and it can have such a huge impact on the directions our lives take, be it in relationships, opportunities, leaving the house 5 minutes later and unknowingly missing what would have been an accident, and on and on. I need to stop worrying about this because I sincerely doubt it's even going to be an issue since job one is a bit over my head (but who knows, someone besides my parents could suddenly decide they think I'm amazing =-p)...I just find the whole situation somewhat frustrating =-(.